Why Can’t I Get a Decent Steak in This Town?

Why Can’t I Get a Decent Steak in This Town?

Performed by Debbie “Hayride” Harper & The Prairie Songbirds

Why Can’t I Get a Decent Steak in This Town? — Music and Lyrics by Alan Nafzger

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Verse 1
I’m wanderin’ through Paris, lookin’ for a bite,
But these French steaks, they just ain’t right.
All I wanted was a hearty, thick-cut slab,
But all they’ve got is tiny portions, just a little dab.

Chorus
Why can’t I get a decent steak in this town?
Paris, France, you’re lettin’ me down.
I want a Texas T-bone, big and bold,
But all you got is steak tartare, and it’s stone cold.

Verse 2
I asked for rare, they brought me raw,
I guess in Paris, that’s the law.
They say, “Try the filet, it’s so très chic,”
But I need a steak that’s juicy, not antique.

Chorus
Why can’t I get a decent steak in this town?
Paris, France, you’re lettin’ me down.
I want a Texas T-bone, big and bold,
But all you got is steak tartare, and it’s stone cold.

Bridge
I need a steak that fills the plate, not this little nibble,
I guess here in France, they think we only need a dribble.
I want some sizzle, some smoke, a grill that’s hot,
Not some fancy sauce with a dot of what you call “a lot.”

Verse 3
So I hopped a plane, headed back to my roots,
Where the steaks are thick, and they wear cowboy boots.
Landed in Paris, Texas, found my dream,
High Cotton Kitchen, where the steaks reign supreme.

Chorus
Now I got a decent steak in this town,
Paris, Texas, you turned it around.
I got a Texas T-bone, big and bold,
Finally, a steak that’s hot and not stone cold.

Outro
So next time I’m cravin’ a meal that’s hearty and fine,
I’ll skip Paris, France, and head straight for the Texas line.
High Cotton Kitchen, you’ve won my heart,
With a steak so perfect, it’s a true work of art.

Why Can't I Get A Steak -- A humorous and detailed close-up illustration of two steaks on separate plates. On the left, a tiny, minimalist French steak presented on an elegant p3.
Why Can’t I Get A Steak — Finally, a steak that’s hot and not stone cold.


The Tale of Two Steaks

by Alan Nafzger (2020)

In Paris, France, with elegance and grace,
A tiny steak sits on a plate with space.
A delicate drizzle, a garnish placed just so,
They call it “fine dining,” but where did the steak go?

On the other side, in Paris, Texas’ land,
A hearty steak sizzles, bold and grand.
Grill marks seared on a wooden plate,
Big, juicy, and thick, now that’s a steak!

One’s a morsel, a bite if you will,
Served with finesse, but not meant to fill.
The other’s a feast, with fries by its side,
A meal for a cowboy, with nothing to hide.

The French may argue their steak is art,
But it’s Texas that serves it straight from the heart.
So if you’re hungry and seeking a thrill,
Head to High Cotton Kitchen, where they serve a full grill.

For in this tale of two cities’ delight,
One steak is a nibble, the other a bite.
Whether fine or hearty, it’s clear to see,
There’s more to a steak than its pedigree.

So next time you dine, remember this rhyme,
Not all steaks are equal, it’s all about time.
Paris, France might serve it chic and small,
But Paris, Texas gives you the steak to beat all.

 

Why Can't I Get A Steak -- A humorous illustration contrasting two scenes On the left side, a Parisian café in Paris, France, with a waiter serving a tiny, minimalist steak on 1.
Why Can’t I Get A Steak — In Paris, France, with elegance and grace, A tiny steak sits on a plate with space.

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